“If you’re going to pursue difficult goals, you’re inevitably going to fall short sometimes. It’s one of the costs of ambition.”
― Stephen Schwarzman
Risks. They are revered as great teachers when they are not present, yet when they show up unannounced, they are often feared and even shamed. We speak of them as necessary companions on our journey, yet when they stand before us, we hesitate, unsure of what to do.
Normalised marginal results
We’re currently in an era where marginal results, referring to the outcomes of venturing into the unknown and taking risks, are often glorified and normalised. While there is nothing wrong with that as such, however, what’s often overlooked is the non-linear process and the risks involved in achieving these desired outcomes.
The sacrifices made by those who have achieved their big goals and dreams, the times they’ve said “no” to more comfortable and stable options, are rarely discussed. It’s understandable; people are more drawn to the glossy end result rather than the on-going journeys with highly potential failures.
Consider how engaging it is to read about people’s failures before they succeed (whatever that means). It’s not because there are no lessons to be learned, but because the story hasn’t reached its climax yet. There’s no contrast, no resolution, which promises you a ‘happy ending’ as a by-stander who is just seeking to be entertained.
Instead, what these stories do is offer a glimpse into the ongoing journey of resilience, determination, trade-offs, and growth. They remind us that success is not just about the destination but also about the journey itself—the setbacks, the challenges, and the moments of triumph along the way. In embracing these stories, we can actually find so much inspiration to persevere through our own trials and tribulations, knowing that it is the effort that makes the whole prize worth of it.
What drives us to take risks
My professional experience, and aspirations for that matter, involve aspects of risk management, which is why I recently read René Doff’s book on Behavioural Risk Management (primarily tailored to the financial sector). Specifically, what I found so interesting about this book and why I picked it up is that it dives into the psychological factors that influence decision-making and risk-taking, particularly among executives.
One of the fundamental lessons I took from the book is that humans tend to take more risks when faced with potential losses, while being more cautious when the risk-taking could lead to greater gains.
In essence, most people prefer to maintain their comfort zones, which is obviously a good thing on a macro level, or simply if you are genuinely happy with how things are. And don’t get me wrong, taking risks for the sake of taking them is not a desired end in itself.
What comes along with this lesson is that to change for the better, you need to fight against the feeling that perhaps you are doing something (objectively) stupid, something that most people would not do. You’re stretching your resources up to a point that most people would not. You are risking it but only through such bold steps can you truly assess eventually whether the journey was worth the risk.
Being strategic about risks
There are essentially two kinds of risk-taking: the calculated, strategic kind, and the more spontaneous, leap-of-faith variety. Which path you choose obviously depends on factors like the situation, context, and your personality, and it is also often not so easy to plan it. It really depends.
But no matter your approach, whenever you’re stepping into the unknown, it’s smart to size up the potential outcomes in advance. As often, the odds of failure outweigh those of success. So, having some backup plans in place is crucial even if you might think that you don’t need them. That might mean, for example, setting aside some financial buffer to sustain any losses or lean periods without a steady income, depending on the nature of the risk.
But equally important is considering the possible downsides or alternative outcomes if things don’t go as planned. Being prepared really doesn’t hurt, and it also allows you to react more effectively if things don’t go as planned, as well as it allows you not to lose hope and feel entirely out of control when you know that the worst-case scenario was also part of the ”game” that you dove into.
Finally, what is equally important, if not even more, in the face of taking risks is the importance of being flexible and adaptable in the new circumstances. I know this is something that is so easily said before any incident has happened, but it is, in the end, very much the right kind of mindset that plays the biggest role when things don’t go your way. Usually, those situations are the ones that will really test your creativity, persistence, and ability to start from zero.
And when you fail and the risk materialises itself?
I bet you have heard the saying how the biggest risk is not taking risks at all. Well, that depends on what you want in your life, so I’ll leave it for you.
But, what is more interesting and soul-crushing is the situation where you take the leap, the risk that could take you where you dream of going, and then in the negative sense, the risk materializes and you lose even more than you had at the beginning.
That is the moment when you call yourself stupid, you feel hopeless, and overall you curse your inability to settle for the ‘good enough.’ How do you move on, or better said, move up, from those situations?
If you recall from above, this is exactly the situation where most people feel like taking even more risk and potentially sink even deeper (hello some ‘too big to fail banks’ stories).
So the fundamental question is, what do you have to lose if you keep going further, and who would be affected if you were to lose everything? That pretty much defines your ultimate, personal risk appetite level, as referred to above.
Once you know your limits already before the worst happens, and when you meet them, you can at least say that you tried. For sure you have a story to tell and a bag full of lessons learned, plus I bet a whole new level of appreciation for the achievements you already had and the level you had reached.
Resilience in the face of failure
So, in the end, risks materialising into reality aren’t necessarily catastrophic unless, of course, you did something incredibly foolish from the start.
Believe it or not, you have moved forward, even if it doesn’t seem like it right now. Be proud of yourself that you have what it takes to go all in and you didn’t give up when most people would have. Don’t care if your story doesn’t make sense yet; ultimately, it will.
But, these are just some pretty words until things actually get better. The real question is how do you keep your head up when nothing seems to work in your favor? Where do you find the energy and motivation to keep going and to believe in your abilities?
It’s interesting how, in hindsight, surviving those situations can make them seem logical and relatively easy. But when you’re actually in the midst of them, it’s far from easy. You still don’t know how things will turn out. Every next decision you are making after the failure almost feels like you’re doomed in a sense. You are so afraid of blowing it all even worse.
So what do you do in those situations? How do you stay resilient and turn the situation into an opportunity?
Well, as mentioned earlier, we tend to normalise and, in a way, romanticise the big outcomes and marginal results without fully understanding the journey it entails. What this implies is that it’s so important to a) live in the present, and b) put all your energy into things you can control today and the small decisions you make.
For instance, even simple things like going to the gym or whatever you do to keep your mind and body calm, are usually our free choices and in our control. And if you remember, it’s often the mindset and the way you talk with yourself that makes the biggest difference when you’re falling short on your ambitions.
So, instead of blaming your high standards and determination, focus and work on your discipline and courage if you’re not yet where you want to be.
Talk about the failure, talk about the risk you took, and how you feel. But remember, who is in control.
